Christmas ornaments have interesting textures

I should know: I sampled most of the ones I could reach.

I don't get the whole Christmas tree thing anyway. I mean, we have a tree in our yard that looks almost the same. Shadow pees on it all of the time, and Rarf hangs toys off of it for me to pull on and chew on. But she and Joe cut a tree down, take it inside, hang things off it, and what happens when I chew on them? I get in trouble. And Shadow won't pee on the inside tree, the big wuss. Go figure.


By the way: this picture? NOT my idea.