Christmas ornaments have interesting textures

I should know: I sampled most of the ones I could reach.

I don't get the whole Christmas tree thing anyway. I mean, we have a tree in our yard that looks almost the same. Shadow pees on it all of the time, and Rarf hangs toys off of it for me to pull on and chew on. But she and Joe cut a tree down, take it inside, hang things off it, and what happens when I chew on them? I get in trouble. And Shadow won't pee on the inside tree, the big wuss. Go figure.


By the way: this picture? NOT my idea.

I love raspberries :)

"Pick your own" is the best! We have the best raspberry patch in our yard. However, Rarf says dogs don't like fruit. Let's puzzle this out: I'm a dog; I like fruit. I love Rarf, but between you and me, she's not the sharpest tool in the shed.

Teenagers . . .

I don't know how to say this, but . . . there is a teenaged human in our house, and he does not like me. Even more amazing, none of his friends like me, either. I'm a NEWFIE, for goodness sake: what's not to like? I am (just ask me) pretty much the sweetest, funnest, beautifulest dog in the world. But all they see when they look at me is hair and drool. They all run away yelling "ewww!" when I try to play with them. They call themselves TEENAGERS??? They're senior citizens with pimples, if you ask me. It's no wonder the world is a mess, when the up and coming generation has such superficial standards. If they would only get to know me . . .

What's so funny?

I heard Rarf yelling for me today, but I couldn't understand why she couldn't find me. Where else would any self-respecting Newf sleep, but in the bathtub? When she finally found me, she started laughing. What's so funny? She sleeps in that awful stuffy room upstairs---which one of us is foolish, I ask you?

Devil dog

Been busy lately! Last weekend I spent a lot of time out in the yard with Rarf. She was digging up plants, and I kept trying to get her attention. Just when I was starting to have fun, she'd run at me yelling, "get out of the burdocks," or "don't eat rocks!" The stream valley was all flooded, and I thought she'd be happy that I was trying to swim, but she screamed something about "beaver fever," and muttered something about "full of the devil" as she dragged me out. She needs to relax some, I think.

She brought Rosie outside---Rosie can fly, so she must be supernatural or something---and Rosie let me sniff her without biting my nose, for once. The best part of the whole day was . . . marrow bones to gnaw!!!